When a child lashes out, a teenager shuts down, or a person becomes distressed in certain situations, it’s easy to focus on the behaviour itself.

But what if that behaviour is actually a message?

One of the most important concepts in Positive Behaviour Support is that all behaviour serves a purpose. Behaviour is often a form of communication, especially when a person finds it difficult to express their thoughts, needs or feelings in other ways.

Instead of asking, “How do we stop this behaviour?” Positive Behaviour Support encourages us to ask a different question:

“What is this person trying to tell us?”

Looking beyond the behaviour

Every day, we communicate in different ways. We might tell someone we’re tired, ask for help when we’re overwhelmed, or walk away from a situation that’s making us uncomfortable.

For some people living with disability, communicating those needs may not be as straightforward.

A behaviour that seems challenging on the surface may actually be communicating:

  • “I’m overwhelmed.”
  • “I don’t understand what’s happening.”
  • “This environment is too noisy.”
  • “I’m anxious.”
  • “I’m in pain.”
  • “I need a break.”
  • “I don’t know how to ask for help.”

When we only focus on stopping a behaviour, we risk missing the reason it’s happening in the first place.

The iceberg effect

Imagine behaviour as the tip of an iceberg.

Above the surface is what we can see:

  • Hitting
  • Yelling
  • Refusing
  • Running away
  • Withdrawing
  • Repetitive behaviours

Below the surface are the things we can’t immediately see:

  • Stress
  • Anxiety
  • Sensory overload
  • Communication difficulties
  • Physical discomfort
  • Fatigue
  • Changes in routine
  • Unmet needs

Positive Behaviour Support helps uncover what may be happening below the surface so that support can be tailored to the person’s individual needs.

A change in perspective can change everything

Consider a child who regularly becomes upset when it’s time to leave the playground.

At first glance, it may appear they are simply refusing to follow instructions.

But when we look deeper, we may discover they struggle with transitions, become anxious about unexpected changes, or need more time to process information.

Instead of repeatedly saying “it’s time to go”, support strategies might include:

  • Providing visual schedules
  • Giving advance warnings
  • Using countdowns
  • Offering choices
  • Creating predictable routines

The behaviour may not disappear overnight, but the person often feels more supported, understood and successful.

Why understanding behaviour matters

When behaviour is misunderstood, people can be labelled as difficult, attention-seeking or non-compliant.

These labels can be frustrating and unfair.

When we take the time to understand the reasons behind behaviour, we create opportunities for learning, growth and positive change.

This approach not only benefits the individual but can also reduce stress for families, carers, teachers and support workers.

Everyone gains a clearer understanding of what is happening and how to respond effectively.

How Positive Behaviour Support helps

Positive Behaviour Support focuses on improving quality of life, not simply reducing behaviours.

This may involve:

  • Identifying triggers and barriers
  • Building communication skills
  • Teaching emotional regulation strategies
  • Developing coping skills
  • Adjusting environments to better meet a person’s needs
  • Supporting families and carers with practical strategies

The goal is to help people feel safe, understood, included and empowered to participate in everyday life.

Every behaviour has a story

Sometimes behaviour is the only way a person knows how to communicate an unmet need.

When we take the time to listen, observe and understand, we often discover that behaviour is not the problem. It is the clue.

Behind every behaviour is a person trying their best to communicate something important.

And when we understand the message, we can provide the support that truly makes a difference.

How LiveBig can help

LiveBig’s Positive Behaviour Support practitioners work alongside participants, families and support networks to better understand behaviour and develop practical strategies that improve wellbeing, participation and quality of life. Our person-centred approach focuses on strengths, goals and helping people thrive in the environments that matter most to them.